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Hey there, it’s Dennis.
In today’s issue:
A confession from a time when I nearly lost more than I gained
The Tiger behind overworking, and why hustle can feel safer than slowing down
How the “Scarcity Loop” keeps us trapped in stress, fear, and productivity
A simple framework to break the cycle and reclaim your time, purpose, and relationships
The Hustle Illusion
It was pitch black outside, save for the illumination from my car’s headlights on the road ahead of me. It was a strange, somewhat eerie, emptiness as I had not seen another vehicle for some time. I pulled into the driveway, the porch light coming on with its motion sensor. Of course, all of the other lights in the house were out. In fact the house looked exactly the same as it had when I left for the office this morning, it was dark and it was quiet.
My wife was already asleep. Looking at my phone showed the time was nearing midnight. She had been asleep for some time now and no doubt was angry, frustrated and disappointed that once again I had not held to my promise of being home in time for dinner.
I too was disappointed that I had again spent so many hours at the office, arriving long before any of my peers and staying long after all of them had left to return home to their families. While wondering what the hell was wrong with me, I was also patting myself on the back for my commitment and dedication to making the manufacturing facility a success.
Tomorrow, I promised myself would be different…
Fast forward 6-months and after another weekend of intense arguing and slinging hurtful words at each other we reached the conclusion that my wife could no longer stay with me in the UK. It simply wasn’t working for her to be isolated from everyone she knows with a husband who was always working and never around, even when he was physically present. As I drove her to the airport, I honestly did not know whether or not our marriage would survive, sure we had committed to working on it and finding a way forward, but the reality was, neither of us knew if we would be successful.
My Tiger roared, reminding me that I needed to get to the plant. There it reminded me I was successful.
Looking back, I cannot believe two things; first, that I was so focused on work and attaining a success that I was turning my back on a core value of “Family First” and second that I was so blind and deaf that I did not see what was happening nor did I hear those who I trusted advising me to change.
My story though is not unique, and in fact, some of you reading this may be in the midst of a very similar story. It is the story that is filled with always checking your phone for emails or messages, taking calls at all hours of the day or night, working 12-hour days consistently, missing birthdays, sports games, plays, anniversaries, etc. etc.
It is agnostic in that it happens all too often, to men and women all around the world. I would love to tell you I realized it and made the changes that were needed to get myself on the path that was truly mine. However, it would be another 6 years before I reached that point.
I will spare you page after page of the same story repeating itself, albeit with some minor, positive improvements in my story and jump ahead to how I finally tamed this Tiger and began living my life as I truly wanted to live it.
Breaking the Scarcity Loop
So let’s get started now, together, so that you can tame what I consider to be your most important Tiger.
Society has created a culture where the Job/Work has replaced the daily struggle to survive that early humans experienced. Hours of toiling away at some “job” have replaced the hunt for food and shelter. The Boss and challenging co-workers have replaced risk and predators.
The more we work, the more we are paid AND the more we pass along. All of it forming together in a solidly constructed scarcity loop.
The Scarcity Loop has three parts:
Opportunity: The chance for reward, approval, status
Unpredictable Rewards: Raises, bonuses, promotions
Quick Repeatability: As soon as you get one, you chase the next
Three Ways to Break the Loop
1. Set Limits
Decide how many hours you will work, then track it.
Create non-negotiable moments you refuse to sacrifice.
2. Be Intentional
Define your target (house, debt-free, more family time).
Remove spending and habits that mask the Tiger’s roar.
3. Create Your Own Loop
Replace external rewards with intrinsic ones. Purpose, family, joy, connection.
The Truth Behind the Hustle
In the end, throwing ourselves into working longer and working harder is an action we take because it gives us the illusion of success, belonging, and value.
While in reality, we are tired, worn out, disconnected, and unhappy.
We are hiding from our true purpose.
Breaking this loop is what lead me to create the H.E.A.R.T of the Tiger coaching program.
Reflection Questions
What would you do if you were not working excessive hours?
What is an activity you cherish with your partner, children, or friends?
When you close your eyes and think of your dream, what image appears first?
Quote of The Week:
“Beware the barrenness of a busy life.” — Socrates
Have you ever noticed that voice that reverberates in your head the minute you consider a new experience or an action to make your dreams a reality? The one that seems to whisper “You’re not ready” or shouts “What if you fail?”
That is the Tiger that I refer to and the idea of creating the metaphor for the Tiger came from Jim Lawless in his book, Taming Tigers.
It’s fear and self-doubt dressed up as protection, convincing us to stay safe instead of stepping forward and growing. The Tiger is loud, convincing and relentless, but here’s the truth: it only has the power we give it.
Every time you step forward in spite of that roar, you weaken its grip and strengthen your own. That is what Tiger Letters are all about, sharing knowledge, experience, fears and inner strength to make your dreams a reality.
So, the next time your Tiger ROARS, smile at it, step forward reclaiming your power and break through the fear barrier into your growth zone.
Before you go, here is ONE way you can work with me.
Book your FREE Kickstart Call with me - 1:1 performance coaching to help you break through fear, self-doubt, and procrastination—so you can finally move forward with clarity, confidence, and courage.
Until next time!
The Tiger Is Inside You.